Advancing the Journey.....Mother's Day

My Mother's Day post is about a week late, but a busy week prevented me from getting to this earlier....such is life! This was no ordinary Mother's Day for me as nothing about the day was remotely similar to past Mother's Days. Unfortunately John had to work that day, but fortunately he didn't have to go to work until after church. For the past 5 years or so, John, the girls and I have met my parents and sister and her family for lunch after church on Mother's Day. I was sad that John wasn't going to be able to join us this year, but at least I would get to see the rest of the family. Just days before Mother's Day, I found out that my parents and sister's family made separate plans and Mother's Day began to feel like "Anti-Mother's Day" without my husband home and my mom and sister away. John (who felt absolutely terrible that he had to work, even though it was out of his control), decided to add a little cheer to my disintegrating day and got me my new puppy, Roxy (introduced in my previous post). Also, my parents decided to join us for church in the morning before heading out to meet up with my sister. I was VERY excited for them to finally experience our new church that we're always raving about. FYI, they loved it too. Later in the day, my "adopted brother" Bill took me for coffee, so Mother's Day turned out okay after all, different, but okay. :)


Often (and especially at Mother's Day), I think about the mothering process and how I mother my children differently than how I was mothered and how someday my daughters will mother there children. I wonder what they'll take from me and continue with their children and also things that they'll change with their children because they didn't like how I did it. As I take a look at myself as a mother, I do recognize some very familiar patterns I've carried on from my mother. I expect my daughters to be respectful and don't tolerate "out-of-control" behavior. I teach them responsibility and accountability and many other things I thank my mother for teaching me. At the same time, I've also learned from "mistakes" my mother made and try to find new ways to handle those issues. Now, let me stop for a moment and make a very important statement: I know my mother did the best she knew how to do with me. I am NOT placing any blame on her, nor am I condemning her. I know I have made just as many mistakes as she did and I will continue to make mistakes. There is NO SUCH THING as the "perfect mother!" I know my daughters will look back at me and say, "I won't do that with my kids!" It's all about the process of bettering our children's' lives and learning from the past. Now, back to the point: I have chosen not to work so I can be a "hands-on mother." I was a "latch-key kid" and I know firsthand the loneliness this caused and how deeply it affected my life. John and I decided that we didn't have our children for someone else to raise. Again, let me say, I am NOT condemning working mothers, this was the choice we made because it works for us. Also, we have the unique situation that John works very odd hours and if I worked, we would hardly see each other and parent the children together. Another thing I do differently is that although I think the husband should be the Spiritual Leader of the house, it is just as important that our daughters see me as a strong Godly woman and active participant in teaching the girls about the beauty of a personal relationship with Jesus. I could go on forever, but my purpose in sharing this is that it's so exciting to see the "motherly traditions" that continue on and the excitement I feel to someday watch my daughters be mothers just as my mother feels about her granddaughters. So....I hope you all had a wonderful Mother's Day and that you take the time to reflect on your important role God gave you as a mother.